Journal with Me: Boundaries

Sep 22, 2021 | Design Your Life | 0 comments

Do you ever find yourself at the end of the day having worked hard but not on what you had intended to do? Rather than moving a project important to you forward or even just taking time for something you enjoy, did you say yes to other people’s needs and desires? Did you forget or sideline your own priorities?

You give time and help to others out of generosity. But at the end of the day do you feel a tiny (or big) sense of resentment that you didn’t make enough time for you? If so, like me, you could benefit from clearer boundaries.

I know, I know, you so want to be kind, helpful, supportive, but let’s dive a little deeper into what happens when we over give of our time and talents.

I love to help others. Serving is a huge driver, but I’ve finally realized that I need to also put on that proverbial oxygen mask to be my best and most centered self. If I don’t, I feel irritated, anxious, and a little resentful. That’s not good for me or anyone around me.

Creating clear boundaries for “me time” and sticking to them is good for you AND your family and co-workers. 

I learned bit by bit to set (and maintain) better boundaries. I started small. 

I learned from a friend and productivity coach that short focused blocks of work are the most efficient (25–35 minutes). So I created a funny sign for my office door which said “Hard at Work, please wait – unless it’s a true emergency that only I can solve.”

I got work done and my kids (and husband) actually solved their own problems. A double win. Sometimes I wrote a blog post or worked on a course I’m taking. Sometimes I used that time just to do what I wanted: read, think, write a letter, meditate, daydream. Setting boundaries to reclaim a few blocks of time each day made a huge difference.

Try these journaling prompts to set your own boundaries: 

  • What would you do with a block of time for yourself? Make a list of ways you could spend 15 minutes, 30 minutes, an hour. 
  • Picture yourself doing one of those things. Describe it using sensory details. How would it feel? 
  • What small step can you take to create boundaries and put yourself first – even for 15 minutes a few times a day? 

Claim your space and time. Do the thing you want to do. 

Want a 90-minute block of time to focus on what you want? Focus Sessions (hosted virtual coworking sessions) give you just that. 

Whether you are trying to get a task done for your job or business or writing a novel or catching up on a class or reading for pleasure … Focus Sessions set a boundary for you, help your brain get ready to focus, and provide accountability. I love them and hope you might too. Check it out: https://www.focus-sessions.com/

Write Into Joy

  • Use journaling as a tool to unlock wisdom from your life
  • Experience more gratitude, awe, and wonder through reflection
  • Discover your own resilience and create a roadmap for future challenges

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Hi, I’m Melanie!

I’m a Journaling and Joy Coach and I believe your story is the key to the life you want.

I guide my clients through intentional processes to find the answers waiting for you in your stories, bringing compassion, deep listening — and fun — to the process.

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