Write a Love Letter to a Friend

Feb 5, 2025 | Connection | 0 comments

Our friendships are so important and I value my friendships. And yet sometimes I get “busy” and forget to stay in touch, to reach out and connect. And that leads to both being lonely and also less connection with the people I truly want to be friends with. 

The month of February is so often focused on romantic love, but I’m turning the lens this month on friendship and connection with friends as well. 

How do you connect with your friends? How do you find new friends (yes, you can make friends as an adult — even if you are shy like me)? 

A Wide Circle of Friends

Who are your friends? That might sound like a silly question, but a lot of people fall under the friendship umbrella. We have layers of friends — and it’s good to have those layers. 

  • Acquaintances — The person you always end up talking with at the dog park, the person you see most days when you get coffee —you make small talk, but you wouldn’t necessarily make plans with them. You probably don’t even know how to get in touch outside of your usual connecting situation. 
  • Casual friends — The person you met at a class at the gym or through another friend or on a committee. You share a bit about yourself, but it doesn’t get too personal. You do things together mostly for fun – walk the dog, book club… 
  • Close friends — Close friends are people you share more of yourself with. You get more vulnerable and know more about them. You turn to close friends for support — and they show up for you and you show up for them. Often these friends are people you connect with regularly. 
  • Intimate friends — These are people you feel the most yourself with and feel like you could count on them for anything. 

There are other ways of thinking about our friendships — old friends (ones who have known us for years and through different seasons of our lives), every day friends (the people we see and do things with regularly), and what some people call a 2AM friend (the person you could call at 2AM if you needed them — see close or intimate friends above). 

The point is not to have the biggest circle of friends, but to have a complete circle of friends — people at different levels, filling different circumstances. 

But no matter what type of friend you are thinking about, friends are precious.

Write a Love Letter to a Friend 

When’s the last time you told a friend what they mean to you? 

Even if you show your friends regularly how you feel — a hug when you meet, showing up for their art opening, bringing soup when they are sick, listening when they’re struggling with something — it can be powerful to really acknowledge your friendships. 

It may feel a little awkward, but it doesn’t have to. Things you might want to say: 

  • I appreciate being able to talk to you about anything.
  • You are the best listener. I always feel better after we talk. 
  • I love that I can always count on you to say the hard things.
  • Thank you for always showing up for me, even when I’m not at my best.
  • Life is more of an adventure with you. 
  • You know when I need to cry and how to make me laugh when that’s what I need instead…

You can say that — and show them with stories of your times together. 

The act of thinking through your time together, how your friendship has grown, how you’ve shown up for each other, how you’ve celebrated and cried and laughed will help you write a friendship love letter. It’s also going to bring up a lot of good memories and make you feel grateful for the friends in your life. Friendship is an amazing gift — and letters like this would be an amazing gift to a friend. Savoring what you love about the people in your life is magical.

And if you are hesitating, imagine your friend writing a letter like this to you and imagine how that would feel? Probably heart warming or full of gratitude for your connection. Don’t worry about making it perfect or long. Just write from your heart. 

To Friendship!

P.S. If you want more direction in writing this kind of letter, you’ll find it in Deepening Connections with Legacy Letters

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Hi, I’m Melanie!

I’m a Journaling and Joy Coach and I believe your story is the key to the life you want.

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